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Mark Twain

1835-1910. U.S. humorist, writer, and lecturer.

Books by Mark Twain

We have the best government that money can buy.

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I was young and foolish then; now I am old and foolisher.

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We are all alike, on the inside.

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He has been a doctor a year now and has had two patients, no, three, I think -- yes, it was three; I attended their funerals.

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In the real world, nothing happens at the right place at the right time. It is the job of journalists and historians to correct that.

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That's what an army is -- a mob; they don't fight with courage that's born in them, but with courage that's borrowed from their mass, and from their officers.

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Put all your eggs in one basket and then watch that basket.

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To arrive at a just estimate of a renowned man's character one must judge it by the standards of his time, not ours.

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My books are water; those of the great geniuses are wine -- everybody drinks water.

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A classic is something that everybody wants to have read and nobody wants to read.

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