Television

It is a medium of entertainment which permits millions of people to listen to the same joke at the same time, and yet remain lonesome.

The difference between writing a book and being on television is the difference between conceiving a child and having a baby made in a test tube.

I find television very educational. Every time someone switches it on I go into another room and read a good book.

TV is chewing gum for the eyes.

So by all means let's have a television show quick and long, even if the commercial has to be delivered by a man in a white coat with a stethoscope hanging around his neck, selling ergot pills. After all the public is entitled to what it wants, isn't it? The Romans knew that and even they lasted four hundred years after they started to putrefy.